December 14, 2014: Pain and Joy

I had surgery two days ago. It was not joyful before or immediately after.

It is interesting to know there is pain, but yet not to feel it—anesthesia does that. If one ignores the pain, even more will gather. If one seeks pain, it can become a litmus test for feeling—something, anything.

In injury, too much pain inhibits healing, too little pain masks the injury. In injury, when pain comes, it can be a relief—a baseline from which to measure improvement. When pain improves, a space for joy is available.

Yet it is not at all necessary to seek pain for joy to have a place. There is plenty of pain to go around—no one shall be left without. There is plenty of joy as well.

I humbly recommend avoiding surgery if at all possible (mine was not), though for me it was a good reminder about my vulnerability as well as about my love.

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